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haiku

by Seaview

DescriptionDriving back from Belfast at the weekend...

Posted: 29.11.11  |  Last edited: 29.11.11

Category:   |   Reads: 122 reads   |  Comments: 9

Tags:

opal twilight
beneath a crescent moon
the city lights

Comments

Kerkedijk

Wednesday, 30th November 2011 | 07:42 pm

Member | Points: 5030

Seaview,

Beautiful visual in opal twilight and crescent moon. I think you could drop "the" in the third line.

You bring the reader's eye upwards with the moon and downwards to the city lights, great light in this one.thumbs up Máire x

susanna Dunne

Wednesday, 30th November 2011 | 08:03 pm

Member | Points: 6481

Hi Seaview

Thumbs Up for a magical piece

Love it. ;-D

John Dinneen

Wednesday, 30th November 2011 | 08:47 pm

Member | Points: 243

Hi Seaview

I enjoyed this - particularly likd the last line - 'lights' could be a verb or noun.

Cheers

John

Seaview

Wednesday, 30th November 2011 | 09:46 pm

Member | Points: 3009

Thanks so much for your lovely comment, Maire. Regarding the article, I know what you mean about but, as John pointed out above, I intended it to be used as either a verb or noun, which I wouldn't be able to without the article, but I guess I don't have to have that option...

James F Linnane

Wednesday, 30th November 2011 | 10:33 pm

Member | Points: 2179

Hey Marian how goes it hope you are keeping well, A lovely descriptive piece, captures the moment perfectly.Well done James

Seaview

Thursday, 1st December 2011 | 10:22 am

Member | Points: 3009

Hi James, I'm well thanks. I have popped in here - or tried to - a few times but the system always seemed to be down on the days I called...or perhaps there were major probs?

Thanks for commenting, it was almost magical with the magnificent colours you get as the sun goes down and the crescent moon suspended over the city lights as we approached Newry - a very pretty vista.

Kerkedijk

Thursday, 1st December 2011 | 12:20 pm

Member | Points: 5030

Marion,

I see that now and understand your thoughts. A beautiful vista of the approach to the city under the moonlight. Wonderful skies at the moment, love clear winter nights and the lights to the city give me that thrill of Christmas time too. Maire x

portdweller

Friday, 2nd December 2011 | 10:19 pm

Member | Points: 6488

Rich and painterly, Marion.. a lovely time of the day/evening...well caught...

Seaview

Friday, 2nd December 2011 | 11:34 pm

Member | Points: 3009

Thanks Maire and Barbara! :]

Speaking of skies - I was absolutely gobsmacked by the striking orange sunrise this morning that silhouetted Narrow Water castle as we drove from Warrenpoint to Newry. I'd written 7 haiku on my phone by the time I'd got to the shopping centre!!!

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