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Golden Wedding

by dpmdcj

DescriptionA Haiku Love Poem. 5/7/5

Posted: 26.11.11  |  Last edited: 27.11.11

Category:   |   Reads: 103 reads   |  Comments: 5

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Our love doesn't age

When you take my hand in yours

My heart skips a beat.

Our love hasn't aged.
When you take my hand in yours,
my heart skips a beat.
Our love hasn't aged.
When you take my hand in yours,
my heart skips a beat.

Comments

tadhgobuachalla

Saturday, 26th November 2011 | 10:07 am

Member | Points: 82

short sweet and lasts a life time

tadhgobuachalla

Saturday, 26th November 2011 | 10:07 am

Member | Points: 82

short sweet and lasts a life time

Leonard

Saturday, 26th November 2011 | 04:15 pm

Member | Points: 499

Nice one dpmdcj! Tender and full of love. you might want to add a t to hear in the last line!!!
Leonard

Kerkedijk

Monday, 28th November 2011 | 12:22 pm

Member | Points: 5030

Dpmcd

Beautiful one. I love haiku too but have moved from the traditional 5, 7, 5 to less syllables. This could be pared back more and be even more effective but I can see you have adhered to the traditional rule and will not tamper with suggestions. It reads so well. No capitals in haiku and no punctuation, just for info. thumbs up Maire

susanna Dunne

Monday, 14th May 2012 | 06:45 pm

Member | Points: 6481

Lovely Dpmcd

So Romanticgrin

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