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christmas poinsettia

by Rachael Stanley

Descriptionself explanatory

Posted: 13.12.11  |  Last edited: 13.12.11

Category:   |   Reads: 247 reads   |  Comments: 9

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Unfortunately, I don't seem to be able to paste the image to go with my haiku.  It won't allow me put it into this space which would enhance the haiku, but apart from that, feedback, advice etc., would be welcomed.  Which version do people prefer? Thanks in anticipation. Rachael

 

sun throws 

light on

christmas poinsettia

or

 

sun shines

on red and green leaves

christmas poinsettia

Comments

Kerkedijk

Tuesday, 13th December 2011 | 10:45 pm

Member | Points: 5030

Rachael,

I like both and the layers in this are many. The Poinsettia is the symbol of the Star of Bethlehem, the guiding light for the three kings searching for the new born child.  The leaves are star shaped.and the symbol of light is really heightened in your haiku and the sun casts light on the leaves. The colours of red and green are important in Christmas decorations with the holly berries and glossy leaves, the christmas trees and decorations, again green with lots of red baubles, red candles, santa, reindeers nose. The color green is a natural representation of eternal life, specifically the evergreen tree and how it survives through the winter season. That’s why, in Christian belief, green represents the eternal life of Jesus Christ. The color red symbolizes Christ’s blood which was shed during his crucifixion.

I would like a combination of the two haiku above, just my suggestions because line one normally sets the scene or has the kigo word and the next two lines link or flow together.

christmas poinsettia

sun throws light (or casts)

on red and green leaves

 

or using the symbolism and playing on the light shining on your poinsettia in your home, the light of the night star would be a good last line and star and sun work well together.

 

light shadows fall

on christmas poinsettia

star of bethlehem

 

Hope this helps a little. Wonderful meaning in this haiku.....like it a lot. Maire x

 

 

 

Rachael Stanley

Wednesday, 14th December 2011 | 01:42 am

Member | Points: 1225

Thanks Maire.  That is so interesting.  I did not know all this about the ponsettia, but just noticed the light shining on it today and felt impelled to try and do justice to the moment, not being quite sure of which worked better.

I really like the one you came up with.  Will look back over this tomorrow. Thanks so much for your response.

 

Rachael xx

Kerkedijk

Wednesday, 14th December 2011 | 10:59 am

Member | Points: 5030

Rachael,

When you get into haiku you will find that you write without knowing the light in this for example is so significant. I have learned so much about plants/nature from writing haiku, symbolism is very big in them and you often write it without knowing, the gift of haiku for me.thumbs up

Liam R

Wednesday, 14th December 2011 | 12:15 pm

Member | Points: 286

Hi Rachael They say in Haiku "Don't tell Show!!"
I like both of these but is there more tell than show in there
My version would be sunlight or
sunshine
reflecting on
Christmas poinsettia

Leaves it ambiguous who's or what is reflecting
What am I doing telling anybody what to write ?? Liam

Pat Kelly

Tuesday, 24th January 2012 | 11:16 pm

Member | Points: 64

Your dead right you would need something to enhance it although in all fairness I don't think an image would be sufficent. you have very little to show for all the time your here

Pat Kelly

Wednesday, 25th January 2012 | 11:58 am

Member | Points: 64

What brought you back here this morning have you nothing better to do with your time go off and mind a couple of children

Rachael Stanley

Wednesday, 25th January 2012 | 12:08 pm

Member | Points: 1225

I had a considerable volume of work here which I took down off the site because most of it was being submitted for publication, and I 'm glad to say a lot of it has been published.  Another poem which I posted here in December was lost according to a recent  apology from Thomas as in their efforts to improve the site, work posted between a certain time in December of 2011 was lost.

I have already emailed Thomas about another one of your rude and discourteous comments which I think in fairness should be removed.

Unfortunately the site has come to this. 

I tried to give this site one more chance because I wanted to show some loyalty to the site that gave me a chance and were good enough to publish one of my poems in their Best of 2010 anthology.

I think you should focus more on the actual piece of work posted rather than mean and sarcastic comments which only show yourself up in a bad light.

I don't know who you are and why you set yourself up as some kind of judge on the amount of work people post, and no  doubt you are also possibly hiding behind a different name to who you really are.

 

Rachael Stanley

Pat Kelly

Wednesday, 25th January 2012 | 12:13 pm

Member | Points: 64

Ah mrs im sorry i was just having a bit of fun i reakky like what you write dont let a madman like me bother you

katrinamunn

Wednesday, 25th January 2012 | 12:14 pm

Member | Points: 71

I think you need to avoid other people writing for you - make sure you stick to 5 7 5 Kate

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